A collection of questions and sharing by our readership community about a wide variety of aspects of social anxiety. Dive in and receive practical insights and advice.
QUESTION BY:
Anonymous
I Have a Problem Making Friends
I have a problem making friends. I don’t know what interests them and how to keep the conversation going. I begin talking and go blank within few mins and they don’t come back, this makes me feel rejected.
Jonathan Responds:
This is a challenging situation;obviously. While there are many manifestations and degrees of social anxiety, your daughter’s boyfriend is at functioning at a very low level. My suggestion is that in a non- critical, non-accusatory, supportive, and loving manner you ask your daughter what her expectations are regarding her boyfriend with such questions as:
How do you feel about the state of affairs?
Do you think things (with boyfriend’s functioning) will change?
If you think things will change, what is your reasoning?
If things don’t change how will you feel about that?
The key objective here is to get your daughter’s attention. You want her to think about it. The non-critical and loving tone (I believe) is paradoxical. This approach may have more productivity than a critical one which will automatically activate your daughter’s defensive position.
